Kitsune in the Shadows

Chapter 79 – Do I Tell Them?

It had been a long day.

First, there was the surprise meeting with Ovia, which was only made more surprising when I noticed that Ava was also there. Then we got to go out and see the city, even if we just ended up seeing a ship run into the pier instead.

We did manage to go shopping in the end… but all I had to show for it was the ring I had been given by Elenia. It was still on my finger, forcing me to remember that it was there through the ever-so-slight warmth it constantly gave off.

Despite that, there was another feeling looming over me. That feeling of being watched had hung over me the whole day, not letting up for a moment, even after I had entered the inn.

…

I quickly finished off my plate, barely taking enough time to process the flavour. It was definitely good; I could see why Daleia was so confident in her cooking. It’s just that I didn’t want to spend any more time in that crowded place than I needed to.

“You’re already done?” Ava said after she swallowed a mouthful of her own food, “I’m struggling to get even this much down after how big our lunch was, yet here you are with a clean plate.”

“…” I didn’t say anything in response, just keeping my head down.

“Hey, you can head up first if you want to,” She said as she brought out a key and placed it on the table in front of me, “Just… try not to fall asleep too quickly. I’ll need you to let me in once I’m done down here.”

“Okay,” I whispered as I took the key.

Ava just went back to eating as I left the table and made my way towards the stairs. After that, it wasn’t long before I was stood in front of the door to our room.

As I pushed the key into the keyhole, I immediately felt an overwhelming sense of relief, as if something had just been lifted off of my shoulders.

What was-?

My thoughts were stopped in their tracks as I almost immediately realised what had changed. That feeling of being watched had just disappeared all of a sudden. It didn’t make any sense. Maybe it would have if it had disappeared once I was inside the room, but it disappearing like that was just… strange.

I decided that thinking about it probably wouldn’t change anything, so instead, I just made my way into the room, making sure to lock the door behind me before falling onto the bed closest to the door.

As soon as my head hit the pillow, it was like all the events of the day hit me at once, holding me in place. It was like I traded that heavy feeling hanging over me for a heavy body as fatigue started to set in. My eyelids were already struggling to stay open, but I knew I had to stay awake for when Ava tried to get in the room.

 Hopefully, she doesn’t take too long… I don’t know how long I can hold on for…

…

‘K-Kierra!’ Ovia’s hurried voice shouted in my mind, helping to wake me up again.

‘Ovia?’ Even if it was unlikely, I had to make sure that it was really her and not me just imagining things.

‘Yes, it’s me. Can we… talk?’

…

‘Where did you go earlier?’ I asked, a little worried about how she had abruptly stopped responding to me earlier.

‘I went to talk with Ellar-’ Her voice cut off momentarily before quickly resuming, ‘Aria about something… T-That’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about.’

Is Aria there as well?n/ô/vel/b//jn dot c//om

I couldn’t come up with any other reason as to why Ovia would abruptly correct herself like that.

‘I- um… We have a task for you… something we want to ask you to do while you’re in Haelmor.’

It was rare for Ovia to directly ask me to do something for her, which only made me want to listen to her requests more, even if it was just a way for me to repay her for everything she had done for me.

‘What do you want me to do?’

‘Today you met another kitsune… Elenia… I… I don’t know how to say this.’

Ovia’s hesitation was making me a little more anxious, but I also knew that she wouldn’t ask me to do anything dangerous. However, despite that, I couldn’t deny that the longer the pause was, the worse I started to feel.

‘Ah, alright. I would like you to take her up on her offer to continue your conversation from today.’

I could feel my heart stop for a moment as her request sank in. I didn’t know what to do, what to say. I was willing to do anything she asked, but this… was difficult… I really didn’t want to talk to anyone I didn’t need to; I didn’t want to take any risks. Despite that, I knew that I couldn’t turn her down with that as my only reason.

However, before I was able to say anything to her, Ovia spoke up again.

‘There’s something specific for you to ask about… so it should be a little easier… Earlier, you seemed interested in the village that Elenia mentioned… I was hoping you could ask her about it.’

…

‘Why?’ I accidentally said to her, confused as to why she would ever need me to ask someone about a village when she could probably just see it for herself at a moment’s notice as a Goddess.

There was another awkward pause before Ovia replied.

‘So… Um… Both Aria and I know about the village… b-but we know about a very different version of that village because… it’s where we grew up. It’s where all kitsune grow up, even now…’ Her voice got a little softer, ‘We… We thought that talking to someone about it might help you to remember something… about… before…’

‘…’

My blood ran cold as her words played over in my mind. She wasn’t doing this because she needed something for me; she was doing this because she wanted to help me… but…

I… What do I do? I can’t- I-I don’t know.

This strange feeling started building in my stomach, then in my chest, then down to my hand. It just kept getting worse, feeling like something was crawling all over my body as well as worming its way through the inside of it.

Ovia was trying to help me… but I already knew that doing what she was asking wouldn’t help me. John had already told me that I didn’t come from anywhere in this world… if anything… as far as this world was concerned, I was just made at the whim of a God.

I just didn’t have a history to remember in this world.

…

Do I tell her?

…

But what would she think?

Would she look at me differently if she knew?

I don’t even know if I can tell anyone… John said he got in trouble when someone found out about me…

What if Ovia leaves me? What if she tries to get rid of me?

I… I don’t know what I would do…

…

I was abruptly torn away from my thoughts by a knock on the door. Almost immediately, I realised that at some point, I had forgotten to breathe, but that wasn’t all. My heart was racing, my palms were sweaty, and my mouth was dry.

I took a deep breath, letting my heart at least try to settle before sliding myself off the bed and heading over to the door.

It’s just Ava…

I hesitated just before unlocking the door.

…

Right?

I decided that it would be best to check and tried looking through the keyhole. However, rather than seeing anyone, I was met with a giant purple eye staring right back at me.

“I was worried you’d fallen asleep,” Ava said from the other side of the door.

Hearing her voice made me jump back a bit, but I quickly pulled myself together and opened the door for her.

“I see you’ve already decided on your bed,” She said as she looked at the state of the room, “Guess that means I’ll take the far one.”

She didn’t waste a moment before racing across the room and jumping onto her bed, knocking a pillow onto the floor.

“I really should get changed… but the bed doesn’t want to let me go.”

Hearing her comment, I realised that she wasn’t the only one who hadn’t changed her clothes.

…

‘Little kitsune? Can I ask you to do something quickly?’ This time, it was Aria who spoke to me, ‘It’s nothing difficult, but would it be possible for me to talk to your sister?’

…

‘Okay,’ I agreed.

Ava had already met them, and it was a request from Aria that didn’t take much on my part… but really, I had hoped that playing along would help me forget about everything that was going through my mind just moments ago.

“Ava?” I called out as I held the pendant in my hand with the chain still around my neck, “Aria wants to say something to you. Is that Okay?”

“… But the bed… it yearns for me…” She said as she awkwardly rolled about, “Although I can’t really turn a Goddess down… Just give me a moment… I need to fight this oh-so-comfy beast off first.”

While I waited, I climbed back onto my own bed. However, Ava’s fight seemingly didn’t take very long, as by the time I had sat down, she was already standing next to me.

“I never really asked how this works,” She said, “Do I just need to put my hand on this, and it’ll work?”

“Mhm,” I held the pendant out in both hands so that Ava could touch it.

As soon as she laid her hand on it, Aria started speaking.

‘Hello again little crow. I know this is rather soon, but I have something to ask of you.’

Aria was met with silence.

…

“Um… How do I speak through this?” Ava eventually asked, her face going a little red.

‘You don’t need to worry about that. I can hear you just fine if you speak like you are.’

“Okay, then… what did you want to ask me?”

‘Well, your sister has been asked to talk to the red-haired kitsune you met earlier today. Not about anything too serious; it’s just to ask her about the village the kitsune came from.’

Ava didn’t say anything in response, yet I could see from her expression that she was thinking about it.

‘Specifically, what I would like to ask is if you could go with her just in case anything happens, even though you probably already would. I had just hoped that you would be able to help her with what she’s been tasked to do, maybe even help encourage her if you think that it’s appropriate.’

“I mean, of course I’d go with her,” Ava said as a matter of fact, “I wouldn’t just let her wander around this place. She’s only been here a day. If I lost her, I don’t even know what I’d do with myself.”

Wait… I… I don’t know if I can do it…

I haven’t said yes… I haven’t said that I’m going to do it…

I… I don’t know what I’m supposed to say.

‘Oh, and for the little kitsune. Sister left out an important detail of her request,’ Aria giggled slightly, ‘Once you’ve completed this little task, you’ll receive one wish from Sister. What that wish ends up being? Well, that is entirely up to you.’

…

I didn’t know how to respond. It was all too clear that Ovia and Aria were trying to help me…  even I could see that much… and now Ava was also getting involved. This wasn’t something they needed me to do for them; it was something meant entirely for me… but I knew something they didn’t. Something I just couldn’t bring myself to tell them out of fear for what might follow.

A wish from Ovia…

How much must she trust me… I could ask her for anything…

…

They… just want to help…

…

I… I can’t…

…

I… I know that the answers I want aren’t there.

I know I won’t find what they want me to.

I don’t… want to disappoint them.

…

I… Maybe I can just ask… if I ask and just say that it didn’t help me remember…

…

But should I lie to them?… Could I even lie to them?…

…

Aren’t I already lying to them by not telling them what I know?

…

I… I just need to ask a question…

I ask one question, and everyone is happy…

…

Everyone that needs to be at least…

‘… I’ll try.’ I eventually responded.

In that moment, I was glad that I had spoken through the pendant; if I hadn’t, I knew that the words would have gotten stuck in my throat before they even got close to coming out.

‘That’s great!’ Ovia suddenly shouted, ‘And remember, I’ll be watching as well!’

‘Alright now, let’s let the two of them get some sleep,’ Aria said, ‘It would do no good for them to be left wandering around town while half-asleep tomorrow.’

At that moment, Ava took her hand off the pendant and jumped back onto her bed.

“Well, you heard them,” Ava said as she picked up the pillow she had knocked onto the ground, “And I very much agree. Sleep is great… and I, for one, could really use some.”

She brought the covers over herself before continuing.

“I’ll just get changed in the morning. I don’t think I have it in me right now to figure out how a shirt works.” With that comment, Ava quickly fell asleep.

I honestly wasn’t in a much better state myself and lay down on the bed, once again feeling the day’s fatigue take hold. Sleep was so enticing that even the thoughts racing through my mind weren’t enough to keep my eyelids open.

‘Goodnight Kierra.’

‘Goodnight Ovia…’

With those last words, sleep finally took hold of me.